Monday’s motivations…

Well, after last night’s scare, with the oven, I think I’ve fallen a bit when it comes to keeping this place up. It definitely seems as if my feelings about this place contribute quite a bit to how well I try to take care of it. And I REALLY couldn’t stand it after last night. My distaste for this place always lies just below the surface. I’m really unhappy here. But I’ve got to keep it up no matter what, because it’s all we’ve got right now. Disappointing, but the truth. We have to stay here until we find something better. I don’t know when that will be. I can’t look at the end of this chapter, and find out what exactly the outcome of this apartment is. I’d like to, but it just doesn’t happen.

I think that might be part of why I don’t like it when people look at the end of a book while they’re reading along. I mean, first, that’s not how the author wrote it. This is built on that, and it leads to what’s at the end. How can you really understand it if you go right to the end of the book and read, even if you do go back and read everything still? And I think it ruins the book, knowing what’s at the end. Isn’t that half the fun of reading? I’m aghast–even my own MOTHER reads the end chapter in the book! 😦 I guess it’s a good thing I’ve been writing mostly flash fiction lately, huh? Then she really can’t go to the last paragraph to find out what happens, can she? When I was at the library for the last entry, I printed off the stuff I’ve posted around lately, so she can read it. I’ll bring it to her tomorrow. Unfortunately, I can’t show her the point I’m at now with it, with all the edits I want to do or have done.

I just paused a few minutes to put the little guy to bed, and go over my story that I hope to be submitting to that contest. I had a few edits I had thought of during the day today, and I needed to do those. Now I’m going to let that one gel for a bit. I’ve got to give it a title yet, but maybe I can get my mom or T to help me with that aspect. The little guy, though, was really tired, and while it was a bit difficult to get him INTO the room, it was actually really easy to get him to sleep. He started nodding off before I even finished our last book each night, Go, Dog, Go! I love sleeping baby hands, they’re so soft 🙂

I’m hoping we won’t have to worry about our seating arrangements for the flights out to Colorado, and the flights back. I want us to get to the airports early enough that we don’t have to worry. And if we’re there 2 hours before our flight takes off (you can tell we didn’t really start to fly seriously until after September 11th, can’t you?), I think we’ll be able to arrange that with little problem. The last few times we went, we were able to pick our flights before we went to the airport, before final check-in. I do NOT want to have to worry about where my kids are sitting, and next to whom they end up. I want at LEAST the little guy to be with me! I can’t believe it’s just WEEKS away!!! I called my dad today, while he was at work because it was when I was thinking about it, to remind him that he gets to bring us to the airport. In fact, when we were picking out flights to and from, I SPECIFICALLY picked these particular flights figuring on that fact—the flight out from Buffalo doesn’t leave until nearly 7pm, so we’d have to be there at 5 (with my 2 hour cushion added in there), which allows us to leave dad’s house at 2 or 3, at the latest. We’ll be leaving our car with him.

I bought myself an mp3 player today. It has 2GB of storage. I’ve already got it nearly half full. There’s like 20 cds here on the desk, plus some of what T already had ripped, and I’ve just been rippin’ and transferrin’, rippin’ and transferrin’. Right now I’m in the middle of ripping cd 3 of the 100 Hymns and Praise Classics 4 cd set I bought some months ago at WalMart. What I’d LOVE to find, is my Songs 4 Worship, Country, because THOSE are my favorite worship songs right now! I LOVE that cd. D put it on top of the tv, and the rest is history, as they say. 😦 I miss it. It’s got Rascal Flatts, Diamond Rio, Ricky Skaggs…”Open The Eyes of My Heart”, “Shout to the Lord”, “He Ain’t The Leavin’ Kind”. But now all I’m left with is the case 😐

Well, I’m pretty tired too. So I will see you all tomorrow (or, I guess, later today), and head off to bed!

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